my life as of right NOW

I guess something I have yet to talk about is the dreaded NURSING SCHOOL. I am in the 2nd semester, and more thankful than ever to be here. I know that when I finish it will totally be worth it. No one can ever prepare you for the sacrifices you must produce in order to complete such a program. I cherish every moment with my family and friends because I know that it might be weeks or months before I see them again. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE NURSING SCHOOL, and CANNOT WAIT TO BE A NURSE... but the struggles to become a nurse have been far more than I could have ever imagined. See, I graduated high school in 2005, and back then my plan was to already be married and graduated by now. Some things we should just leave to God, and I know that He is the reason I am here right now. I live my life by the simple quote, "everything happens for a reason," and have for quite some time. I may never know the reason something happens, but I do know that I am beyond questioning those reasons. I do not think it is for me to ever understand, so I will leave the planning up to Him. Back then, I had my entire life figured out, I passed every class, and had dreams bigger than the stars in the sky. I still have those dreams, some of my life is figured out, and the other is when my nightmare began. See, highschool was a doozy, and the first 3 years of college weren't too bad either, but nursing school was on a whole new level. It was first semester 2 years ago this fall, and for the very first time I failed. I failed my class, and inside I felt like I had failed my family, my friends, and everyone around me. I couldn't seem to pick my broken heart up off the ground, but that is what I had to do. It was the only choice I had left. We are taught to hold our head high, but I was far from that. I could barely open my eyes because they were so swollen from all of the tears. From there, my world went into a downward spiral. I no longer had control and felt like my entire being had been stolen right beneath my feet. For months, I grieved and I questioned...I had studied harder than I had ever studied for that class, but obviously God had other plans. Although it took some time to do so, I have learned a lot from my first failed class. I know that I may never know His reasons but what He wants is all that matters. I know that I have met some of the greatest people this time around in nursing school, and I know that there are far worse things in the world than failing a class, and for that I am grateful.